Archive for the ‘Experiences’ Category

Protected: The selfish Selflessness : A Monologue

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The bucket of Water and the Sun

A bit of historical context always helps. So I’ll start with mine to explain that bucket of water.

Long ago, I left my religion Christianity, disenchanted by its dogma. I specifically hated it when the Bible preaches that if you don’t place your entire faith in Jesus, then you’re bound to hell no matter how righteous you have been. I thought: what??If your life has been spent doing good things for the world, then ultimately it comes to nothing if you don’t believe in Jesus Christ? What kind of ‘merciful’ and ‘loving’ God is he? Only a tyrant demands that you submit before him. I don’t want to bow before such a tyrant even if he holds the keys to heaven.

I began to explore other religions. I explored Hinduism and like the idea of divinity in all things of the universe. However the caste system is a big turn off. I explore Islam and was instantly repelled. I found that it was worser in its dogma than Christianity and very misogynistic. There are verses which calls for imposing Islam to the entire world and killing those who leave Islam.

However, after leaving religions, I found that there was certain emptiness in my heart. Something that religion gave me was missing. I found the answer: Spirituality. It is often a term which was used interchangably with religion, but now I understood its true meaning: the feeling of connectedness with the universe. I haven’t found any logic to explain it, because it isn’t the logical part of your mind that deals with it. You just need to allow your heart to guide you in your spirituality – it will come along.

Religion in the end, I found, was just a collection of spiritual experiences by ancient prophets – but like any other man made stuff, there are flaws. Like “follow me or go to hell” dogma of the three semitic religions or the caste system of Hinduism. Spirituality meanwhile is a ocean – there is the limitless universe and you can only connect yourself to so much. Religion is like a man who took a bucket of water from that huge ocean.

What about the sun? Well, its the current object that I’m connected to. The huge factory of nuclear fusion reaction that gives out heat and light that had been powering all the life in our planet Earth. Without it, we wouldn’t have existed at all. And I’ve dedicated myself to using renewable energy to counter global warming caused by fossil fuels. Hence I call myself the Solarii Knight or the warrior of the Sun.

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What you don’t want

To find what you want in life seems like tough job to me. Especially when parents make most of the decisions and leave very little for you do decide. While parents decide the best for their wards and thereby put them into a fail safe path for a settled life, I feel that it can become boring after sometime. What true happiness is there in fulfilling the dreams of your parents and forgeting your own dreams? Will you make your kids to live the unfulfilled dreams of yours?

There are cases where however, when trying to fulfil the dreams of your parents can break you. When you do something which you don’t like at all, your mind automatically shuts down and does not operate at full potential. You will have to drag it along to make it work. You may not suceed in the case. You may not know what is need in life, but there are things which you don’t want.

My experience with this situation was at XII standard. I didn’t know anything about the future and I was just living the moment and studying the subject which I liked the most – mathemetics. Followed by physics and chemistry. However, my mother often forced me to study biology to become a doctor. I wasn’t very interested in biology and certainly trying to live my mothers dream was taking a huge toll at that time. So after somtime, I silently gave up studying biology seriously and put all my effort into styding mathemetics, physics and chemistry – for I was quite a above average performaer and the public examination and entrance examination demanded exceptional performance in order to get into a good college. My secret plan paid off – the maths entrance examination was the toughest paper every seen and my performance was excellent. The final ranking for engineering admissions was something I never dreamed of before and I got the 2nd best collge in Tamil Nadu.

This post is dedicated to my fellow comrade.

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How Listening Helps

Today a person approached me with an issue in his computer.  His laptop’s touchpad was not working. He told that the had accidentally disabled it somewhere and was unable to enable it. I did not ask him further for anything more. Being a good solver of problems, I set out armed with my considerable knowledge on computers. I reinstalled the touchpad in his computer and it worked. However, when the computer was restarted once, the old problem returned again. This left me scratching my head. Now I asked him whether there was any way to enable/disable the computer’s touchpad. He said he did not know. I looked through the function keys of the keyboard and all of a sudden he said that the option to disable the touchpad came when he was trying to increase the volume of the computer. I looked at the volume increase button in the keyboard. Nearby was a function key combined with the touchpad symbol. I pressed that key and the option came up to disable the touchpad. I enabled the touchpad, thereby solving the problem permanently.

From this I learned that listening to others helps. Here, had I asked him more questions instead of plowing into solving the problem, I would have known exactly when the problem had occurred and solved the problem more quickly.